Familiar

Eyes startled open
A loud ringing somewhere

Blink
Catch your breath
Blink again

A flash through the haze
The painfully bright screen
Of an abandoned phone

It's 5 pm
Dark, bleak and silent
Familiar

Wasn't this the place you just escaped?
Maybe you're still dreaming
Maybe you're still there

Pinch yourself
Groan
It's reality alright

Not much different than your dreams
Fear, insecurities, monsters
They follow you here too

Conniving bunch
Shapeshifters, you call them

Your throat's tight
As you hug the pillow close
You can't seem to escape it
Maybe you even like it

It doesn't seem to matter
Eyes open, eyes close
You always end up there
So why open them at all?

A drawn out breath
Escapes your open mouth
The sound somewhere between
A wail and a content sigh

Your eyes flicker shut
On your last thought

Give in
It's too tiring anyway.

Moments

Beauty, I see, as you run, 

                     Hair wild, arms open, bare feet

From the cool sand, into the cold water,

                     And the morning waves, you greet

Music, I hear as you laugh,

                   Mischievous, childlike, and innocent

Cheeks flushed with a rosy hue,

                   Which the morning air lent

A waltz, I imagine, you dance,

                  Graceful and elegant, each move

And the waves surge around you,

                  As if to a silent melody, they groove

Freedom, I experience, through you,

                  Arms thrown open, head held high

Ready to embrace the whole world,

                  Like the seagulls we see, free to fly

Dreamy, I feel, as you move again,

                 Winking, your full lips curve into a smile

As steps towards me you slowly take,

                 With fervor, ardor, I'm overwhelmed for a while

Love, I understand, as you take my hand,

                 Into my eyes you stare, awe and wonder

My fingers brush your cheek softly,

                In that moment, my soul, to you I surrender

Perfection, I experience, with you in my arms,

                Time stops, only heartbeats heard, no other sound

Together, we watch the sun rise over the ocean

                Life, in you, its meaning, I found

...................................................................................................................................................................

Life's meaning...sometimes you find it in those few perfect moments just looking at someone you love.  

Just a little something I penned down a while ago...hope you guys like it.

I'll be back soon, I promise :)

Pic courtesy: Google, and The Notebook (The movie).

If Only

If only,

I could take back my words,

I'd say the right ones, and tell you,

How much you mean to me

If only,

I had another chance,

I'd spend each day of my life,

Making up, for every mistake, I made

If only,

I could stop time, for a moment,

I'd take that moment,

And live a lifetime with you

If only,

I could look at you once,

I'd remember each expression,

Each move that you make

If only,

I could hold your hand,

I would never let it go,

I'd be by your side, forever

If only,

I could take you in my arms,

I would feel alive again,

I'd find a reason to live

If only,

I could kiss your lips,

I would breathe again,

And, my soul would rejoice

If only,

I could spend my life with you,

I would be complete,

And, there would be no regrets

If only,

You would say yes,

I'd give you every happiness,

I'd make all your dreams come true,

I'd make you my world, my life

Each breath I'd take, would be for you

If only,

You would love me,

I'd be there in the end

I'd make every thing real, 

I'd be your best friend

I would love you,

More than there are stars in the sky,

More than the darkness of night, 

More than the vastness of space,

More than the heat, a fire could ignite

....................................................................................................................................................................

This one came to me suddenly, and I wrote it down in such a short time, which is very unusual for me because usually, it takes ages. The title and some of the feelings I felt while writing this down, came from the movie "If  Only". I found the movie beautiful, about second chances and, love and, mistakes...and regrets.

And, these lines from the song, "If Tomorrow Never Comes", by Ronan Keating, again, got all my emotions fired up!

"I made a promise to myself,

 To say each day, how much she means to me

 And avoid that circumstance,

 Where there's no second chance, to tell her how I feel

 If tomorrow never comes..."

Okay, so I hope you all liked it :) Good night guys. Sleep tight :)

An intangible connection...

All day long I've been feeling so restless...can't focus on anything for more 

than a few minutes, it's like something's amiss and I can't figure out what it is...So finally, in what seemed to be like the nth futile attempt (hmph!) in calming down my mind, I picked up an old book of poems (The Golden Treasury) I'd found a few days back while rummaging through some old novels and books stacked away in cardboard boxes. It's really quite old, you know, the kind of book with its pages stained so that they look all yellow and brownish, torn at places...and the paper looked so brittle, making me hesitate to even touch it in fear that it might just crumble into pieces. I guess that's what gives the book so much character...On the third page I found my grandmother's (nana's) name dated 1974 and I don't know why but it felt so strange going through her book, like it found me, like she left it for me...and I felt so warm suddenly, not because of the beautiful poetry (half of which, I admit, I do not understand at all ;)) but because of small notes written here and there, lines underlined, words and paragraphs circled, pencil marks...It got me wondering what she must have been thinking about while reading a particular verse, why she had found some parts particularly interesting? Where she must have been sitting while reading that verse? What she must have been wearing? Was she alone at that time or did she and grandpa share this together? Was she lost in her thoughts, trying to find a little peace and solitude , trying to calm down her mind just like me? All at once, I was able to conjure up an image of her in one of her beautiful sundresses comfortably sitting in a sunny veranda somewhere, rocking away in her rocking chair...and even though I never got a chance to meet her (she died before I was born), I suddenly felt so close to her, like there was something intangible between us...and this last attempt of mine didn't turn out to be useless at all...All's calm now.